Scream-Free Parenting

This week, our MOPS meeting focused on calm parenting - with ideas taken primarily from the book Scream Free Parenting, by Hal Runkel. A few of the main points:

Calm yourself down by:
- Recognizing that you feel angry
- Understanding yourself and your trigger points . . . this includes pressure from within (lack of sleep, poor nutrition, hormones, personal expectations), pressure from without (relationships, finances, kids' behavior, others' expectations), and the anxiety that lies beneath your anger
- Increasing your window of response time . . . by counting to ten, taking a few steps back, giving yourself time to think

Take the anger out of discipline by:
- Precluding angry situations . . . that is, establishing patterns and habits that help prevent situations that lead to anger - for example:
- Constantly fill your children's emotional tanks
- Say yes to your kids as much as possible
- Don't use the phrase "pick your battles," because that puts you in the wrong frame of mind from the git-go (i.e., winning and losing, war, etc.)
- Know what your child understands developmentally
- Minimize surprises and maintain routines
- Build in time buffers (for example, take 15 minutes each evening to prepare for the next morning)
- Letting the consequences do the screaming . . . that is, remembering that the right consequences will get the desired result without you ever having to raise your voice

MOPS moms enjoying breakfast


MOPS Coordinator Lisa Hadlow

This week's announcements:

- Our November Ladies Night Out will be a Make Your Own Cards and Gifts Night on Wednesday, November 11 ($10 cost to cover supplies). MOPS moms should be receiving an Evite shortly; if you didn't receive the October Evite, please email DarienMOPS@gmail.com and we'll get you added to the list.

- The off-week Bible study "Where to, Lord?" continues on Wednesday, October 28, 9:30-11:00, and it's not too late to come; please email Elaine at elainetalking@gmail.com if you're interested.

- Operation Christmas Child: Each MOPS table is putting together two shoe boxes of gifts for less fortunate children around the world; don't forget to bring your items to the next meeting, November 4. If you missed this week's MOPS, your table leader will be contacting you about what items are still needed for your boxes.

Open Heart, Open Home

What are the stumbling blocks to making friends and building friendships? What does it take to be a friend? And what are the relational benefits to opening up our homes? These are some of the questions Janet Leighton addressed in her talk at the last Darien MOPS gathering.

MOPS members were encouraged to "be a friend" by taking genuine interest in others, listening well, being encouraging, and accepting differences. We were also challenged to get past an "entertaining" mindset and find ways to open our home to others - and, for some help and encouragement, Janet directed us to flylady.net, a site that helps you "gain control of your house and home."

Announcements from the October 7 meeting:

- The next Ladies Night Out is pottery night, October 22 (RSVP was required by October 8).

- Off-Week Study: A Bible Study on understanding God's guidance in your life continues October 14 (3rd study of 6) from 9:30 to 11 a.m. Please email Elaine Mullins at elainetalking@gmail.com if you would like to attend.

- MOPS Directories: If your page is not in the directory, which was distributed at the October 7 meeting, please email Sima at sfdfarmer@yahoo.com and we will add your page and any other new pages in an addendum later this fall.